When we were children, our parents, teachers, and adults in our lives evaluated us. Their assessments of us – whether they were right or a bit off – left lasting impressions on us.
If negative words were occasionally used to describe you as a child, you would have grown up internalizing those labels and built your future with that kind of knowledge as a foundation- a shaky foundation of false beliefs. The results of their assessment, expressed with negative words, had the power to shape your self-perception and overall view of life.
As adults, we now have the responsibility of periodically evaluating ourselves honestly. This self-assessment requires us to confront important questions like:
What are your goals? What are your plans on achieving them given your present circumstances and surroundings?
I agree that these take time, effort and sheer honesty – all of which demands inner strength.
Take a moment to reflect on what fuels your self-confidence.
- What makes you believe in yourself?
- What is holding up your self confidence? That is, what is the foundation of your confidence?
Is it built on external factors such as:
- The approval, cheers and accolades of others?
- The status of your friends – friends with class, in high places and positions of power and influence, friends with money?
- Your spouse’s accomplishments or reputation?
If your confidence relies on these external sources and many others unmentioned, ask yourself: Would you still thrive if the applause stopped, the bright lights dimmed, and the crowd disappeared?
On the other hand, the question could be, what might be causing your lack of self confidence?
- Do you speak negatively about yourself?
- Have you experienced verbal abuse that still speaks to you?
Who are you, and why are you the way you are? Your true assessment of you would help you in many ways. If you do not truly believe in your self, or if your confidence is built solely on external factors, it may be unreliable and easily shaken.
Don’t get me wrong, we are not created to be in vacuums. We are not meant to navigate life in isolation. We thrive when we are part of well-oiled support systems. Most of us would confirm that we do better when we receive positive and encouraging words from our friends or family who motivates us to pursue the right path or become better versions of ourselves.
Evaluations are necessary for better planning of the future. I believe in planning – for pretty much everything.
If I don’t have a good idea of what I want at any point in time, I most likely will not even take a step of action and if I do take a step, I may not do so well. Without a clear sense of direction, you may struggle to take action. You may ask, what about taking risks? However, even taking risks necessitates prior evaluation. I often do take calculated risks not reckless ones.
Having faith in God does not mean we are blind to the situations facing us. On the contrary, we are very aware of the issues while leaning on God’s divine intervention.
Sometimes, those of faith-based backgrounds may hesitate to acknowledge difficult realities, believing it signals a lack of faith. I have seen and heard people deny the reality of situations they face claiming it is not God’s plan for them. They mistake accepting reality as being weak in faith. I beg to differ. I believe accepting reality is not weakness—it is wisdom. While God does want only the best for you, you are not 100% challenge-proof. God never promised a life free of challenges.
Also, how do you go before God if you are not transparent with Him – or yourself – about your situations? We may not always understand fully what we are feeling or how to articulate our concerns, but God knows it all.
Granted, you may become fearful and full of anxiety if going through a situation. God invites us to come before Him, just as we are. You don’t have to be perfect, clean, or have earth shaking faith to appear before Him. The thing is, honest self-evaluation will foster clarity, which paves the way for desirable solutions.
Success is rarely stumbled upon. Success must be planned for. Each phase of one’s life must be evaluated and replanned to ensure you’re on the right path. By taking time to reflect and reassess, you can make adjustments and move forward with clarity and purpose.
Evaluation is not just a means for understanding where you are; it’s also a roadmap for where you want to go.
Stay tuned for the next feature on “Moving forward with Evaluation”.